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VB Warnie has been sitting on my coffee table completely silent for a few days now, so I decided to pull him apart (as you do). The instructions clearly state (they even give you a picture) that he must be sitting approximately 2 metres in front of your telly and that he would only talk during the Commonwealth Bank one day series. That's what made me think he must listen for tones during the telecast, but by pulling him apart I could tell for sure.
[UPDATE] If you have read the rest of this story (click the "Read more..." link below) and you have read any of the comments you would know that there are a lot of people that are very unhappy with this years VB promotional doll. VB Warnie has a few issues. There seems to be two main ones. If he does talk, then he is way too quiet. There is no way you can hear what he is saying with the telly at normal volume and any chat going on in the room will certainly drown out what he has to say. This is made worse by the fact that most of what he does say is only a few words, so by the time you realise he is speaking it's over. The other problem seems to be VB Warnie's that simply don't talk at all. At least one person has posted a comment here to say that theirs worked after they replaced the batteries. I would have thought that might muck up his internal clock, but maybe not.
I decided to have a look at some of my web site stats to get a feel for the problem. Since the ODI series started 356 people have hit this story after searching in Google. Many more have come from links on other sites (Digg for example), from simply entering www.tasweb.org in their browser, or via other search engines, but I decided to limit this to only Google. Of those 356 people, 126 of them obviously have an issue with their doll. That leaves 230 others who just searched for stuff like "VB Warnie" (55 people). Bear in mind that a lot of them may have been having issues as well, so that makes my figures very conservative. My primary school math taught me that this means well over 35% of all people searching the net for info on VB Warnie have problems. That's a pretty high failure rate. I wonder if the guys in the suits at VB are aware of this (remember the feedback link on the VB Warnie website has been taken off line ever since the ODI series started) and if they are aware of it, I wonder if they are happy?
Below are some of the common Google search terms from my web site logs that I attrubted to VB Warnie problems;
to make warnie doll talk, warnie not talking, doll won't work, warnie volume, does the warnie doll talk, doll no talk, warnie doll doesnt work, +warnie + not working, +warnie + not working, to make talking warnie talk, warney won't talk, isn't the warnie doll working?, warnie broken, warnie doesnt say stuff, warnie speaker, doll volume, doll quiet, i turn my warnie doll up etc etc etc.........
Read on to see my thoughts and pictures on Warnies gizzards.
If your on the home page then click the "Read more...." link to see the pictures...
 OK, the first thing I did was peel off the little green sticker on the back. I could feel a hollow bit so it had to be covering something. Behind I found a printed circuit board with a few exposed pads that must be used to program Warnie. I assumed at this point that this was used when he was first made and would never be of any use again, but later discoveries have me wondering about this.
 The next thing was to undo the four screws on the back and open him up. He was laying face down on the table during this operation, but I doubt it was the first time Warnie had found himself face down on a table. This revealed three main components. There was a surface mount printed circuit board with four wires coming off it. Two went to the battery compartment and two went to a speaker. Where was the microphone to pick up the tones from the telly? Hmmmm.
 VB Warnie is heavy. Much heavier than Beefy and Boony, so I pulled out the battery compartment to find out why. There are three AA batteries in there. WHY? Three AA batteries will probably last for years. Could it be that they were cheaper than something smaller? Could it be that the electronics needed 4.5 volts? Could it be because VB Warnie has a really big speaker and is really loud and draws more current? Could it be that VB Warnie is intended to have a much longer life than just this summers one day cricket series? This was when I thought about the exposed pads on the circuit board visible through the fairly largish hole in the back. Could it be that we will be able to reprogram VB Warnie later, or is it just to allow them to reprogram the ones they don't sell this year for next years series as well becuase they have signed Shane Warne up to a two year contract?
There are a few close up shots of the circuit board here. I looked up the chip on Google and it's a 2k EEPROM. That confirms that VB Warnie could be re programmable. Interestingly the manufacturer's web site says this part has been replaced and is not suitable for new designs. Perhaps Warnie really is a bit dodgy. There is also a black blob. This is weird. It's as if they have sealed something up so that you can't see it as the blob has been splodged onto the board. If I was prepared to trash Warnie then I would prise the blob off, but I want to hear what he has to say, so I've left the blob intact. Maybe that's where he is hiding his mobile phone? I have no idea what the shiny silver cylindrical thing is. The code on it just brings up heaps of Chinese parts suppliers on Google with no description of what it might be. A crystal to make sure that VB Warnie's internal clock is
accurate maybe? Given that he doesn't have a microphone he must be programmed to talk at certain times just like Beefy and Boonie last year.
Well, thats pretty much all there is to VB Warnie for 2008. I'll be sure to post another story if he ever talks. I guess I should leave you with the very important message printed on the side of VB Warnie in tiny little white letters.I
'm not sure exactly what they are trying to say. I hope that by pulling him apart to see what is inside and how VB Warnie works I've been "Enjoying him Responsibly", or is that a warning to women about the real Shane Warne?
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Some brits
